


Freak.

by BorderJ95



Series: Dyfty - Sad :( but then Hopefully Good! :D [1]
Category: Casualty (TV)
Genre: 2nd october, Casualty, Crying, I left it on a cliff hanger, M/M, Negative Thoughts, Oh, Sad, Self Loathing, Social Anxiety, Spoiler Alert - Freeform, Tumblr, dyfty, dyfty day, it might get better, sorry - Freeform, trekkiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-01
Updated: 2015-10-01
Packaged: 2018-04-24 07:16:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4910191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BorderJ95/pseuds/BorderJ95
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is based on Casualty season 29 episode 43 "The Long Haul"<br/>(The ending (Can it be considered an ending?) is not part of the episode :P)</p><p>Enjoy Dyfty :)</p><p>This was written for Dyfty day on Tumblr (2nd October)!<br/>(Here you go Trekkiel!)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Freak.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



Dylan was having a particularly awful day. Firstly his father and his new girlfriend Hazel had come in after crashing his truck. Whenever he tried to speak to him his dad just snapped and told him to get on with his job and treat his girlfriend – who was pregnant by the way! 

It was finally time for Dylan’s break so he decided to stop by the staff room and get a cup of coffee. As he neared the door he was not surprised to find that there were other staff members already in the room. Dylan walked into the room- nobody had noticed him yet.

Lofty had his back turned away from the door making a cup of something- hopefully he’d save some of the already boiled water in the kettle so Dylan didn’t have to waste time filling and boiling it himself. Lofty suddenly spoke.

“It’s hard to imagine Dylan having a dad isn’t it?”

Dylan stopped. What? Why is he talking about him? Why is it hard to imagine him having a father? Everyone technically has one. 

“I just always thought he was the kind of person sent from another planet to study us!” Lofty continued. 

Dylan felt a slight pang in his chest. 

“It’s, uh, it’s this thing called human emotion, uh. Baffles me,” Lofty said in a low voice. Was that meant to be him? Is that how people saw him? Do they… do they do this often? Make fun of him? Imitate him? Talk about him behind his back? They must do. Of course they do. Well, why shouldn’t they? He is a freak. He’s not normal. And he’ll never get better, he’ll only get worse. Everyone thinks he’s strange. He’s… he’s…!

“Lofty,” Tess suddenly said sharply. Lofty spins around and his eyes widen. Is it guilt Dylan sees? No, it’s not that kind of guilt. He’s not feeling guilty about what he said; he’s guilty that Dylan heard him say it. Lofty. The warm, child-like nurse who easily makes friends with everyone he meets. That’s who said it. If he said it then it must be true- though Dylan already knew that.

“Dylan,” Lofty said in shock. Dylan didn’t react. He stayed completely still, his eyes trained on Lofty, his favourite mug in hand. 

Lofty instantly walked towards him. “D-do you want a coffee or something, or?” he asked in slight panic. 

Panic that Dylan now knew about their feelings towards him.

Dylan didn’t reply. He glanced over at Tess for a split second (she looked like a deer caught in headlights) before turning back to Lofty, still not saying a word. Lofty continued to stare at him in nervousness until he decided to suddenly go for his mug. Dylan let go of it. It fell to the floor and smashed.

Lofty immediately crouched down for it. “Oh, your mug!” he exclaimed. Dylan heard Tess’s annoyed sounding, “Oh, Lofty.” 

“Sorry!” Lofty started scooping up all of the pieces of Dylan’s now broken favourite mug. 

Dylan suddenly felt incredibly unwelcome in the room. He looked over at Tess and – was that Charlie’s son Louis? They were both staring at Lofty trying to get all of the shards. Tess had a look of pity on her face while Louis just looked amused. Dylan took a step away from Lofty (and his broken mug) and promptly left the staff room. He felt eyes on his back as he departed.

________

 

The next hour was mentally frustrating for Dylan. Whenever he saw the Doctors or nurses conversing he just knew it was about him. How could it not be? He was the outsider. The freak. Everyone knew. Everyone thought it. Dylan’s sure everyone talked about it! 

He. Was. A. FREAK.

An alien like Lofty said. 

A weirdo like his childhood bullies said.

A mistake like his father-

“Dylan, um-“ Lofty was suddenly next to him at the reception desk. Dylan didn’t look at him. “A-about what happened in the staff room,” Lofty paused to see if Dylan would say anything. When he didn’t he continued, “I-I didn’t mean it,” At this Dylan looked up, but not at Lofty. “I-I don’t know why I did it… Actually, I- uh, I was just showing off,” Lofty stayed silent, awaiting Dylan’s response.

A wave of grief swept over Dylan at that moment. He felt like his throat had closed up and there was a stinging in his eyes. He attempted to compose himself. When the silence had started to get too long Dylan gently nodded his head. As he spoke he looked back down. “Yeah,” he muttered quietly. “Of course.”

Lofty stared at him sadly (though Dylan still didn’t look up). It was what Lofty said next that made Dylan want to go sit in a corner and cry.

“I sometimes think in another life we… might have been mates.”

In another life. Not this life. Why would he want to be friends with him? Obviously he doesn’t want to actually be friends- he’s just trying to make himself feel better about Dylan hearing him call him an alien. That’s all. Obviously. 

Dylan heard footsteps approaching them. He glimpsed up and saw Tess (noting that Lofty still hadn’t taken his eyes off of him). Dylan was suddenly overcome by a strong urge of wanting nothing more than to be as far away from Lofty as possible. 

“I think Tess is looking for you,” he told to Lofty (still not looking at him). 

Lofty turned around and came face to face with Tess. 

“Lofty. Your patients waiting,” Tess told to him. Lofty nodded and without looking back he followed Tess to cubicles. 

If nothing else, then that was proof that Lofty was false. He couldn’t wait to be away from Dylan. 

The sadness once again overwhelmed him. He bit him bottom lip (that of which had started to tremble slightly) in an attempt to stop the sob threatening to escape. He quickly grabbed his files and speed-walked back to his patient.

His heart suddenly clenched in a painful way. He could feel the tears begin to slide down his face. Dylan quickly looked around and spotted a cleaners supply room door. He practically ran to it and flung the door open. He darted inside and slammed the door shut.

It was dark. All he could see was the light coming through the cracks in the door. All he could feel were the warm tears spilling down his cheeks and the clenching of his despairing heart.

He had no idea how long he spent in that cupboard. It mustn’t have been long because when he exited nothing really seemed any different. Plus, the clock on the far wall read 2:25. The last he checked it was 2:10. And that was just before Lofty came to ‘apologise.’

He readjusted his button up shirt and continued making his way back to his, undoubtedly irritated by the long wait, patient.

On the way he was stopped by Cal. “Hey, Dr Keogh. I was wandering if you could- are you alright?” Cal asked in surprise, probably because Dylan seemed to be showing some kind of emotion. Dylan wiped his wet eyes- he attempted to make it look like he was just scratching the bridge of his nose.

“Wha-? Oh, yeah, I’m fine,” Dylan replied. Cal suddenly looked worried. “No, seriously. Are you al-“ Dylan interrupted him, eager to change the subject. “What was it you wanted?”  
Cal gave him a calculating look. He clearly worked out that Dylan didn’t want to talk about whatever was bothering him. “I was just wandering what you made of these results? It’s always good to get a second opinion on these kinds of things.” Dylan then spent the next few minutes assisting Cal with his patient who had come in complaining of a twisted ankle that turned out to be a fractured leg.

_____

 

Lofty turned the corner and saw Cal, Ethan and Charlie talking- they all looked worried. He approached them.

“Hey, guys,” he greeted. “What’re you talking about?”

The three men turned to look at him. Charlie glanced at the other two. “Have you noticed anything strange going on with Dr Keogh?” he asked. Lofty looked at them in surprise. “Why?” he asked. Ethan answered him. “Well, Cal went to ask him to look over a patient’s results but it apparently looked like he had been crying,” he explained. 

Lofty was shocked. Was it because of what he’d said? But he’d apologised! He hadn’t even meant it! He likes Dylan! Like, really likes Dylan. He has no idea why he said that. Why did he say that?! And what was with the ‘in another life’ thing? That clearly didn’t help any! That obviously suggested that he didn’t want to be friends! Well, ideally he’d want to be more than friends but that is beside the point! 

He had to go and find Dylan and make things right. 

_________

 

Dylan was going home. There was no way he was going to stay in that place a minute longer. Why should he impose himself on people that obviously despise his very being? He’ll just give them all what they want…


End file.
